Generating Fun IIb

It is by now no secret that i love a good online generator. Hey, for that matter, I'm pretty fond of even the kind of bad online generators. The whole concept is fun and the utter uselessness of the end product is a huge part of what attracts me to these.

So let's look at a few more fun ones. Here is a site that helps you generate a suicide note in just a few easy steps. You usually only have to visit this site once.































Not unlike a suicide note is the Alanis Morrisette song. As usual, on this site, you just fill in a short form with a few verbs, adjectives and emotions of your choice, and you've got a song that Alanis would be proud to perform for her next album.












































Looking for something a little more uplifting, a little more colorful? Who doesn't love a bit of graffiti? Go here and design yourself a "tag," and if you want you can even print out copies and tape them up all over the place at work to leave your mark.

















Sign generators are a classic among generator tools, and are always fun. To make yourself a neon sign, this is a good site. To make yourself a street sign, maybe name a few streets in your area after yourself, go to Easy Street.









Sign Generator is another great place with the longest list of possible types of signs to create I've ever seen. Unfortunately most of them are apparently not working, or they weren't the day i was there. In fact, only one of the eight or ten i tried did generate anything:





















Restaurant signs are great because you can name the place after yourself and feature bizarre dishes, and have the message saying something rude to would be customers. I love it. At redkid.net you can make a storefront sign. On the Atom Smasher site, you can make a Chinese Restaurant sign, among other things. Actually, another thing you can make there is a wide assortment of Error Warnings.



















































Finally, at MakeSweet, you will find all kinds of fun generating options--flags, including animated ones, bottles, tattoos, billboards, the list goes on and on. For now, I've gone with a flag and billboard that each feature my likeness.









Culturedrone is everywhere.

Generating Fun IIa

Who doesn't love an online generator? I know i do. You can use them to make funny signs and to decorate cereal boxes or cigarette cartons. Yup, generators are a hoot, which is why they will be featured both this week and next.

One great place to locate fun generator tools from around the web is The Genrator Blog. From here you can find tons of generator web sites. The ones highlighted here barely scratch the surface, so you'll no doubt want to check it out for yourself.

First, one site offers the ability to create a handy eye chart. This is great because, who knows, you might just need one in order to monitor your family's ocular health. Not only that, but you can make the letters in the chart spell out funny sayings and insults, as i did.























Or, go here and make yourself an eternal life coupon, which then means you'll never die. I made myself one...





















But later wondered if i really wanted to live forever. I don't, so now I'm looking for a site to generate me a re-instate mortality coupon. so if you know of one...

On the Ben and Jerry's website you can make your own ice cream flavor; you choose what goes in it, what it's called and BAM you got yourself your very own flavor.














































Then go here and create an answer for the virtual magic eight ball. When in doubt, something containing "fuck you" always works for me.
















If you find yourself being audited by the IRS, as I often do, you can go here and generate whatever bogus receipts you might need to verify some of the "business expenses" you claimed.


















Ok, this is disgusting, but on the virtual vomit page you can, well, generate vomit .




































And you can even click on the "vomit" for an audio. What a nice touch that is!

The Drug Inventor offers the chance to create a new drug--from what it's called and what it does to how it's packaged.

































































































In just a few short steps you have your own drug, named after you and designed to cure or prevent whatever ailment you want.

Or, better yet, go to this site and generate a prescription for whatever you truly need to feel better.

So...This is My Problem, and What I Amount to In Beer

Ok, well, thanks to the folks behind the Rum and Monkey site, I have had two long burning questions answered for me today:

1) What the hell is my problem?





















All I had to do to get to the bottom of this was enter my name, and the What's Your Problem page came back with a helpful answer.
















This is interesting, because i don't really think of myself as a red neck per se, but he other two parts of this assessment are dead on.

The next question finally answered for me today, courtesy of this site's amazing Beer-O-Matic, was 2) How many beers do I need to consume in order to say I've drank my weight in beer (as this has always been a goal of mine)? I simply input my weight and preferred beer delivery method














and instantly I got the Answer:






Now I can finally say with no hesitation that I have indeed consumed my weight in beer, about a thousand times now. Let's see if we can't get that number up to 2,000.

What a long (or short) strange trip it is

There are some pretty strange people out there. I am very thankful for that, by the way. Consequently there are some pretty strange websites too. The following are examples of sites that are set up so that upon entering, the web surfer is then transported through a series of pages filled with bizarre and/or surreal images.

The Phone. Upon arriving here, you receive instructions: click on the telephone's receiver to pick it up and then use your mouse to dial the three digit number provided and bam...



















you are transported to the first of a series of interactive and completely strange pages. A mouse-over on this page sets crows flying from branch to branch, but click on the apple and all the birds die! And the next number is revealed.













Back to the phone and dial, and then you end up at another strange page which eventually reveals another three-digit number to "dial."



















Which then takes you to another weird page, and then another, and so on.













Totally fun.

Then there's Screenvader. This site starts with a series of symbols on the screen. Mouse-over to see a preview; click on it and a colorful graphic takes over the screen.














When you get bored of it, simply go back and click on other space to reveal more random and often odd images.



















On Superbad you have choices. Each screen contains several items to click on and each one of these leads you someplace different, to another page with different options...
















click on one and once again you are transported to something strange.






































It isn't always simply an image; sometimes it is a funny letter or a twisted tale. You just never know where you will end up.



















Finally, Wake Up is provides a simulation of sorts of a day in the life of a McDonald's employee. With this site you can get a glimpse into this life, and shape it as you go because this site, too, offers choices at every turn. Keep hitting snooze, or get your lazy ass up and take a shower. Skip the shower and have breakfast. Drive to work fast or slow. You choose your dinner and then whether to watch TV or go to bed, even whether to dream in color or black and white.
























I imagine that these are but a few such sites out there. Like I said, I appreciate the bizarre, and will definitely keep my eye out for more great specimens of this genre of website.

Coffee snobs, Oracles, and Election Time

McDonald's has just recently added espresso drinks to their menu of culinary delights. There promo campaign includes the notion that it tastes as good as one from a designer coffee shop like, oh let's say, Starbucks. McDonald's espresso is less expensive because, well, because it's not from a popular and trendy coffee shop like, um, Starbucks, it's from Mickey D's, where you can get a whole meal for $3.50.

Along those lines, the corporation launched a new website that allows users to compose a letter to friends and family members who have fallen pray to the lure of expensive and delicious Starbucks coffees, letting them know what their behavior is really doing to them and how they can change.


















I never miss an opportunity to send to a friend something I've created on line, so i threw a letter together for my best friend and emailed it to him right away.























Because he, like me, can't stand iced coffee of any kind and has never even entered a Starbucks or any place like it, he didn't understand it, but I explained to him it is ALWAYS fun to send it to a friend; whether or not it applies to them doesn't matter.

That's right, we can't stand Starbucks and their snooty, stupid drinks and complicated menu. Plus we just like plain old coffee. But Starbucks is great for another reason, which is that I'm a firm believer that you can tell a lot about a person by what they order at the hippest coffee spot (that actually sucks) on the planet. The creator(s) of the fun stuff on Buttafly would seem to agree, as this site features The Oracle of Starbucks.

Simply type in a drink order--I went ahead and put it what my buddy Johnny and I would order, if we went in there, which we don't, because we're too cool for that.





















And the oracle came back with information about our personality types. Um...















Well okay, of course the oracle of STARBUCKS favors people who would order their most expensive drinks, because he is obviously working for the company. So I decided to see what the oh so brilliant oracle has to say about a friend of mine who I know does go there and does order something ridiculous. I've heard her say it, but I don't even know what it means.




















I know what it says about her now, though. HA!

















Essentially, just as i suspected all along, going to Starbucks makes you an ass, regardless of what you order from there.

That was fun, and informative. Incidentally, Buttafly is a fun site that offers more than just the oracle. Given the current political climate of the country and the highly charged contests between Obama and McCain, Democrats and Republicans, as election draws near, I know people will find some of the items available on this site to be not only fun but extremely timely.

The application which allows the user to generate an Obama quote is as much fun as it sounds like it would be. You just choose a few words or phrases, like you would for a Mad Lib, and POW!


















The site generates not one but three versions of a powerful and inspiring, yet awesomely silly Obama-esque quote.



















Another fun thing featured on this site is a little something called Political Debate Bingo. Simply print it out and play along as you watch candidates in every contest debate one another on the "issues."























Oh my god what a hoot, and not at all depressing that you candidates "ideas" and "beliefs" are really as shallow and predictable as this game suggests.